Adventures in Bad Parenting: Our Bodies, Our Selves

The follwing conversation actually occured. No names have been changed because no one is innocent.

Wes: *hiccup*

Wes: *hiccup*

Me: You know, there are people who've had hiccups for years.

Wes: No there *hiccup* aren't. You're just *hiccup* messing with me *hiccup*.

Me: No, I'm not, Google it. One guy had them for more than 50 years, I think

Wes: clack, clack *hiccup*, clackity, clack clack "OH MY GOD, 68 YEARS??!?

Me: See? Wes: What would you do *hiccup* if you had a kid that had hiccuped *hiccup* for years, mom?

Me: Sell tickets.

Wes: You are just the wo*hiccup*rst kind of person

Me: SEE THE HICCUPING FREAK, ONE DOLLLAH!

Wes: You suck. *hiccup*

Me: Okay, everybody that wants a crap sandwich for dinner hiccup right now!

Wes: ...glare...*hiccup*

Me: bwaahahahaha. Okay, everybody who wants to make out with the guy from X Files, hiccup right now!

Wes: ...glare..*hiccup*.

Me: bwahahahahaha. *clapping* Yay, I found a new activity!

Wes: everybody who *hiccup* thinks Mom is a pain in the ass hiccup now *hiccup*

Me: ~blank stare~ Go to your room, son.